Fail Well To Grow Well
Failing is inevitable. At some point in each of our lives, we will all fail at something, be it personal or professional. What separates failing from failure, however, is what we learn from the experiences and whether we get back up. In my own life, I’ve failed numerous times, both personally and professionally.
These setbacks have taught me five valuable lessons about how to fail well and grow from the experience.
1. Reframe the Notion of Failure.
Everyone fails. Failing is a normal part of life. When we view failing with a broader perspective, which is seeing failure as merely a step in the process toward success, it loses its grip on our psyche. While you may have members in your network who view failing in an extremely negative light, don’t let their perspective affect your reality. When you push the boundaries and don’t play it safe, you will sometimes fail.
I have snow skied since I was four-years-old. I can ski down green or blue runs making wide, slow turns all day long and never fall or fail, but I’m certainly not challenging my skiing abilities if I do so; I’m just playing it safe. To grow as a skier, it’s imperative that I move to the single or double black diamond runs and risk falling on my bum. Michael Jordan didn’t make his high school basketball team and had a pretty dismal record making plays from the free throw line, yet he’s one of the greatest basketball players of all time and led the Chicago Bulls to six championships in eight years. When we see successful people in the height of their career, we forget they were not always so. Reframe your perspective and consider failure as a necessary building block to success.
2. Learn From Failure and Grow.
It’s been said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The most significant benefit of failing is the opportunity to learn from what went wrong and apply the lessons toward the next step you take. When I didn’t get a job I wanted, was laid off, fired by a client, or lost a competition, I took the time to reflect upon what happened, ask questions, evaluate my role in the event, and make changes. Some of my best ideas and biggest successes came from developing a method or process that was informed by my failure. I may not have succeeded in my next effort, but I’ve rarely failed twice for the same reason. The four-step process of trial, error, evaluation, and try again not only leads us to success but also exponential personal growth.
3. Keep Moving Forward, Trying, or Shift Direction.
The worst thing you can do after failing is to quit or become paralyzed by worry over failing again. Business coach, consultant, and author Rhett Power defines failure as “failed tasks not human beings.” I couldn’t agree more. We only become a failure after a fall if we stop trying if we sit down and we permanently let the setback affect us. Don’t let your world become small. Decide if the next step is to “get back on the same horse” and try again, or to shift your tactics and try a new direction.
4. Create an Environment of Curiosity, Acceptance, and Where Failing isn’t a Career Death Knell.
In your organization, encourage an environment where team members feel safe to take chances, push the envelope, and try new things. With this type of culture, individuals will take risks, and when they take risks, they will grow. When employees fail, rather than reprimand them, treat the failures as teachable moments. Environments that allow employees to fail and grow produce stronger emerging leaders and fresh ideas.
5. Acknowledge the Failing and Take Responsibility.
Failing well means acknowledging when you have failed, bringing it to the attention of stakeholders, and offering a solution to move positively forward. You look like a coward when you try to hide failings, and you have no opportunity to redeem yourself if you don’t take responsibility for your actions and don’t think through a path forward. While I would never hope for a problem with a client, customer or friend, it does create an opportunity to strengthen the relationship through the series of steps you take immediately following the mistake. Step up; if you do, you may end up with a relationship that is stronger than if no error had occurred.
The next time you fail, remember the famous words of former president Theodore Roosevelt, from The Man in the Arena section of his Citizenship in a Republic speech. “The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming…”
