Mastering The Basics of Business Networking
One evening, my sister Clare and I attended a women’s networking event where the host announced that we’d start with an icebreaker activity to learn to be better networkers. I got a little gleam in my eye (and Clare chuckled) when we heard that the individual who collected the most business cards would get a prize. You see, Clare knows I can get a little competitive and that I love to network. So she told me, “Go for it, Carol.”
I certainly didn’t want to let my little sister down, so I wasted no time approaching a group of three women who were chatting nearby. I stuck out my right hand to the first woman whose eyes met mine and I said, with a smile as I shook her hand, “Hello there. I’m Carol Sente. What’s your name?”
The goal was to get the most business cards, so I purposely made each interaction short.
Therefore, I stuck to the basics:
Make direct eye contact
Smile
Tell them your name
Ask for their name
Repeat their name with interest to lock the name in your brain
Ask to exchange business cards (proof of the interaction for our icebreaker contest)
Offer a short comment and move on to your next targeted group.
These basics work for icebreaker contests (yes, I did win that night!), but also provide a good framework for working a room when your goal is to meet a lot of people in a short span of time. I don’t remember what I won as the prize that night, but what I really won was a lifelong realization that there is immense value in building a large and deep network of personal and professional contacts.
Becoming a networking superstar is all about having a plan, stepping into the action, and following up to turn connections into relationships.
What is Networking, and Why Do So Many People Hate It?
My definition of “networking” is turning strangers into acquaintances, partners, friends or information sources by interacting with them in thoughtful ways. It’s about meeting people with the intent to get to know them, exchange information and develop relationships, especially to further one’s career or goals.
There are two kinds of people ― those, like me, who love stepping into a room full of strangers to say hello, and those who absolutely hate it. For those of you whose hands become clammy at the mere thought of business networking, I suggest you approach networking in small bites.
To begin to feel more comfortable with networking, practice in more intimate, controlled environments; even a 100% social environment with friends can be a good venue to practice networking skills. A second idea for my introvert friends is to take a buddy, like I did with Clare. I’ve been known to call a friend attending the same event who I know is well known in those circles, and ask him to introduce me to a few people I want to meet. Just be sure to prep your friend ahead of time to include you in a three-way conversation and to allow you time to speak to the person you wanted a connection with.
Having clear goals for the networking event is vital to feel more comfortable, and this blog post outlines some helpful strategies/tips. Business professionals come with varying degrees of networking comfort. Regardless of where you start, it’s important to face that discomfort head-on if you plan to grow a business or establish yourself as an expert in your field.
A big network is good. A quality network is better. A large, high-quality network should be your ultimate goal.
When it comes to networking, quality and quantity matter. It’s meaningless to have a big network of contacts or a large box of business cards if your only recollections of those people are that you met them once, briefly, at some event ― that their names sound familiar but you don’t know what you have in common or how a relationship with them might be valuable. And even if you do remember the people associated with the cards stacked up on your desk, it’s not all that helpful unless those people remember you, and are willing to help you.
How to make that happen? Be memorable, make a good impression and ― if you can ― do something thoughtful for them.
Stay in it for the Long Haul and Keep Honing Your Skills
But here’s the hard part. Even if you follow these networking basics, you won’t always know if someone you meet will be helpful. Be realistic and think about this from various time perspectives. Some contacts can help you immediately, and some might not be valuable to you until years from now when they, or you, change jobs. If you have remained in contact with them, even occasionally, you can reach out to them when they could help you.
Most importantly, don’t always think about networking as meeting someone who can help you. Think of how you can help others in their careers and lives. There is nothing more memorable than someone who wants to help you in your career. Everyone likes connectors and this is a great technique to use in networking. You don’t have to have all the answers for someone, but it can be priceless for you to point them in the right direction.
Remember that there is no need to go overboard; think about what and whom you know that would benefit a new contact. A simple introduction or piece of information may be extremely helpful and appreciated. F or example, did you meet someone new to the area? You could offer to introduce them to the handful of individuals you already met at the next event. (A little caveat and my rule of thumb when considering making introductions of a contact to my network: I only make introductions to my network and speak about their business if I have used that individual’s services myself.)
Let me leave you with one last thought. You won’t get better at networking without experimenting and building this skill. Networking is a case of “practice makes perfect.” So while there are books (and blogs!) on networking that are worth the read, the best way to learn and hone new skills is to attend events with different co-workers or friends and watch what they do and how others respond to them. Even introverts can be great networkers. While there are some networking basics everyone should follow, personalize your networking style to your comfort level, be true to your personality and have some fun with it.
